Total Reroll Equinox: Episode 20 – Dinner and a Show

Welcome to Total Reroll Equinox, our new actual play Dungeons and Dragons podcast! We’re starting in a brand new world created by our DM Ian, with new characters (but returning players from our previous game!), so join us in the world of Saugin as we explore (or try to explore) the land of TarTiir!

This week is the third episode of ‘The Right to Ruul’ story arc, and the gang are off to a travelling theatre to chase down a lead that one of the rods of power, legendary artifacts that supposedly stopped the Darkness before, is being used as part of the production.

Download this episode (right click and save)

You can find a little bit of background on the world of Saugin and TarTiir here!

Our intro and outro music is ‘Welcome to TarTiir’ by Ed Curry. Featured image by Kekai Kotaki.

Enjoy!

tartiir-updated-ep10

An updated map of TarTiir. We are on the road from Ispep to Ruulgrad

Fancy supporting the site? You can pick up all of the 5th edition D&D books from Wizards of the Coast using our Amazon links below, and we’ll get a cut with no extra cost to you!

Dungeon Master’s Guide

Player’s Handbook

Monster Manual

Volo’s Guide to Monsters

Sword Coast Adventurer’s Guide

Starter Set

Total Reroll Equinox: Episode 19 – Timothy’s Tower

Welcome to Total Reroll Equinox, our new actual play Dungeons and Dragons podcast! We’re starting in a brand new world created by our DM Ian, with new characters (but returning players from our previous game!), so join us in the world of Saugin as we explore (or try to explore) the land of TarTiir!

This week is the second episode of ‘The Right to Ruul’ arc, and we are going into a library to research the world-ending darkness! I promise.

Download this episode (right click and save)

You can find a little bit of background on the world of Saugin and TarTiir here!

Our intro and outro music is ‘Welcome to TarTiir’ by Ed Curry. Featured image by Kekai Kotaki.

Enjoy!

tartiir-updated-ep10

An updated map of TarTiir. We are in Ispep, south west of Scaleberg.

Fancy supporting the site? You can pick up all of the 5th edition D&D books from Wizards of the Coast using our Amazon links below, and we’ll get a cut with no extra cost to you!

Dungeon Master’s Guide

Player’s Handbook

Monster Manual

Volo’s Guide to Monsters

Sword Coast Adventurer’s Guide

Starter Set

Total Reroll Equinox: Episode 18 – The Right to Ruul

Welcome to Total Reroll Equinox, our new actual play Dungeons and Dragons podcast! We’re starting in a brand new world created by our DM Ian, with new characters (but returning players from our previous game!), so join us in the world of Saugin as we explore (or try to explore) the land of TarTiir!

This week is the start of our next arc, ‘The Right to Ruul’. After witnessing the destruction of Scaleberg and barely escaping with our lives, we’re on the road again and trying to find out more information on the Darkness.

Download this episode (right click and save)

You can find a little bit of background on the world of Saugin and TarTiir here!

Our intro and outro music is ‘Welcome to TarTiir’ by Ed Curry. Featured image by Kekai Kotaki.

Enjoy!

tartiir-updated-ep10

An updated map of TarTiir. We are at Hearth, south of Scaleberg.

Fancy supporting the site? You can pick up all of the 5th edition D&D books from Wizards of the Coast using our Amazon links below, and we’ll get a cut with no extra cost to you!

Dungeon Master’s Guide

Player’s Handbook

Monster Manual

Volo’s Guide to Monsters

Sword Coast Adventurer’s Guide

Starter Set

Total Reroll Equinox: Episode 17 – A Thousand Red Eyes

Welcome to Total Reroll Equinox, our new actual play Dungeons and Dragons podcast! We’re starting in a brand new world created by our DM Ian, with new characters (but returning players from our previous game!), so join us in the world of Saugin as we explore (or try to explore) the land of TarTiir!

This week is the finale of the of ‘The Last Hours of Scaleberg’ arc, where the gang were trying to take a well deserved break in a small fishing village, before some cultists started acting up. Now the sea has risen up and everything has gotten a little apocalyptic, which is what happens whenever I try to take a weekend off too.


Download this episode (right click and save)

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The town of Scaleberg. We enter from the entrance to the south west, the red shapes are buildings, with the docks and the sea to the east and boats in blue. Lighthouse is to the south east. The circle and X nearer the middle is the statue to the goddess of light, the one closer to the south east and the lighthouse is the abomination altar.

You can find a little bit of background on the world of Saugin and TarTiir here!

Our intro and outro music is ‘Welcome to TarTiir’ by Ed Curry. Featured image by Kekai Kotaki.

Enjoy!

tartiir-updated-ep10

An updated map of TarTiir. We are at Scaleberg, east of Dead Water and the Tomb of the Tabaxi King.

Fancy supporting the site? You can pick up all of the 5th edition D&D books from Wizards of the Coast using our Amazon links below, and we’ll get a cut with no extra cost to you!

Dungeon Master’s Guide

Player’s Handbook

Monster Manual

Volo’s Guide to Monsters

Sword Coast Adventurer’s Guide

Starter Set

Total Reroll Equinox: Episode 16 – Slime Time

Welcome to Total Reroll Equinox, our new actual play Dungeons and Dragons podcast! We’re starting in a brand new world created by our DM Ian, with new characters (but returning players from our previous game!), so join us in the world of Saugin as we explore (or try to explore) the land of TarTiir!

This is part two of three of ‘The Last Hours of Scaleberg’ arc, where the gang were trying to take a well deserved break in a small fishing village, before some cultists started acting up. Always the way.


Download this episode (right click and save)

wp-1487538347450.jpg

The town of Scaleberg. We enter from the entrance to the south west, the red shapes are buildings, with the docks and the sea to the east and boats in blue. Lighthouse is to the south east. The circle and X nearer the middle is the statue to the goddess of light, the one closer to the south east and the lighthouse is the abomination altar.

You can find a little bit of background on the world of Saugin and TarTiir here!

Our intro and outro music is ‘Welcome to TarTiir’ by Ed Curry. Featured image by Kekai Kotaki.

Enjoy!

tartiir-updated-ep10

An updated map of TarTiir. We are at Scaleberg, east of Dead Water and the Tomb of the Tabaxi King.

Fancy supporting the site? You can pick up all of the 5th edition D&D books from Wizards of the Coast using our Amazon links below, and we’ll get a cut with no extra cost to you!

Dungeon Master’s Guide

Player’s Handbook

Monster Manual

Volo’s Guide to Monsters

Sword Coast Adventurer’s Guide

Starter Set

Total Reroll Equinox: Episode 15 – The Last Hours of Scaleberg

Welcome to Total Reroll Equinox, our new actual play Dungeons and Dragons podcast! We’re starting in a brand new world created by our DM Ian, with new characters (but returning players from our previous game!), so join us in the world of Saugin as we explore (or try to explore) the land of TarTiir!

The gang is has arrived in the fishing town of Scaleberg for some much needed R&R. This is the start of a 3-part arc called The Last Hours of Scaleberg. This visit is unlikely to be restful or relaxing.


Download this episode (right click and save)

wp-1487538347450.jpg

The town of Scaleberg. We enter from the entrance to the south west, the red shapes are buildings, with the docks and the sea to the east and boats in blue. Liighthouse is to the south east. The circle and X nearer the middle is the statue to the goddess of light, the one closer to the south east and the lighthouse is the abomination altar. The blacksmith’s building we visit is the top most building near the water.

You can find a little bit of background on the world of Saugin and TarTiir here!

Our intro and outro music is ‘Welcome to TarTiir’ by Ed Curry. Featured image by Kekai Kotaki.

Enjoy!

tartiir-updated-ep10

An updated map of TarTiir. We are at Scaleberg, east of Dead Water and the Tomb of the Tabaxi King.

Fancy supporting the site? You can pick up all of the 5th edition D&D books from Wizards of the Coast using our Amazon links below, and we’ll get a cut with no extra cost to you!

Dungeon Master’s Guide

Player’s Handbook

Monster Manual

Volo’s Guide to Monsters

Sword Coast Adventurer’s Guide

Starter Set

D&D Tales – Dragon Hatchery (Part One)

Adam continues his descent into roleplaying games in a new D&D campaign.

For our fourth night we had present Ravoprax the dragonborn druid, Artin the dwarven fighter, Carnicula the elven sorcerer, Red the human barbarian and Eldo the forest gnome cleric, with a couple of absences due to people having lives or something. We awoke in the town of Greenest, and wandered into the town square to meet the governor and our friend Leosin, whom we had saved last time from imprisonment in the dragon cultist camp. Presented with a map of the cave system at the back of that camp, ominously titled ‘Dragon Hatchery’, Leosin asked us to go and check it out, find out what was hidden there and try to scupper the plans of the dragon cult. He was heading off to the nearby town of Elturel, to discuss the cultist threat with a companion of his, and if we met him there after scoping out the hatchery we could get some more information a decent reward.

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Our trip back to the camp was uneventful, passing through the blood stained area of the fight we had last time, the dead bodies now largely expended carrion. Using the ‘Speak to Animals’ spell gained from following the barbarian ‘Path of the Totem Warrior’ option at level 3, Red spoke to a crow that was pecking out the eye of a dead cultist, and asked it to fly ahead to the camp and scout it out for us. An hour or so later we approached the camp ourselves, the crow having not returned yet, and we saw that almost all of the tents, including the large command tent, had been burned to the ground as the cultists had packed up and moved on. The only cluster still standing was to the east, and as we walked up to them we saw a small group of hunters gathered around a cooking fire, slowly roasting a crow that they had shot out of the sky (it seems this power will only be useful if your DM isn’t a dick).

We started to talk, as they clearly did not want to try and fight us. They were simply hired by the cultists for aide, to help bring them food and other items – they weren’t exactly prepared to throw away their lives for the cult. However, they also weren’t keen on spilling all the secrets of the cult, as they would likely want them dead too for that. Carnicula used a ‘Friend’ spell on the leader, a timed charm that made the target trust the caster – for a limited time. Immediately afterwards, the target would know that they had been put under a spell. We used the chance to ask about the remaining cultists in the cave below, with a few kobolds, cultists and the lieutenants Langdedrosa and Frulum Mondath all still down there. Once the spell wore off, the mentally violated hunter spat on the ground in front of Carnicula, before they all packed up and walked away.

We headed to the cave entrance. Fortunately, the previously bright and sunny day that would have cast our shadows deep into the hatchery as we approached and spoiled the element of surprise had clouded over, with the credit largely being attributed to Eldo Timbers Cracklebang constantly praying to his tempest god Talos.

clouds

Praise Talos.

As we slowly tried to move in, it was clear that there were enemies laying in wait for us behind some of the large stalagmites inside. Red moved forward to reach around and grab an enemy, and as the waiting dragonclaw raised an axe to cut off her arm, Ravoprax turned into a bear and attacked him savagely. Red then drove her sword into his throat, ending him before two more of his fellows sprung into action, facing down the tag team of the barbarian woman and the bear-dragonborn-druid.

lightning attack

Further behind, an ambush drake jumped down from a ledge above right onto Eldo, ripping into the gnome and nearly one-shotting him. One of Eldo’s abilities is for an arc of lightning to strike anyone who melee attacks him, so with 1HP he managed to deal some nice retaliation damage to the drake. Then, with the help of a firebolt from Carnicula, he finished the ambush drake off with ‘inflict wounds’ – literally ripping the life from the now dried husk of a lizard. Meanwhile, Ravoprax took some substantial damage from one of the dragonclaws, losing the bear transformation. Backing off, he finished him off with a dragon breath. As Red fought the other, cutting open his stomach (which was miraculously kept in place by his armour), Artin finished him off with an arrow from a support position with the spell casters. Three kobolds then appeared at the end of the cave, and Red, after activating rage, ran up and cut one down. Artin ran in from the back and ruined the second, while Ravoprax used a thornwhip spell to grab the last and finish him off.

 

We pressed on, moving down a corridor and into a nearby room where we found a cultist asleep and snoring loudly. We put on our various stolen robes, with Eldo balancing on Carnicula’s shoulders to wear the bear-sized robe we created last time. We started to talk to him, unconvincingly as we all threw terrible rolls. Eldo managed to hit Carnicula in the face, and when he cried out in pain from within the robes the cultist threw knives at him. Red tried to attack him, and failed so badly that she fell prone on the ground. Fortunately the bad luck didn’t continue, Ravoprax killed the man and we moved on. But not before looting the body, as is tradition.

As we pressed on, we came to another room. It appeared to be a barracks, now largely bare except one man drinking at the table, wearing ostentatious purple armour and an ornate dagger and scabbard with a dragon design. Ravoprax, Carnicula and Red all decided to stumble in, pretending to be drunk, while the others waited at the door…

Come back next time for the conclusion of the Dragon Hatchery episode, including lightning, infanticide and vengeance!

Adam

 

 

 

So it’s All Come Down to This… Zombies and Herpes Arrows

Adam has started playing Dungeons and Dragons with some friends in London. Here is his account of their first epic journey.

We returned straight back into the fray outside the cave at Wyvern Tor, with a group of orcs rushing towards the entrance to fight us. The ogre Gog was at the forefront, but as he reached us the dragon Venomfang made his reappearance. He swooped down, grabbing Rick and Deano in each of his claws, picking up Tiny by his pack hanging from his teeth (guess which three party members were away for this session?), and flew off with them, cackling. At the sight of the dragon, the ogre turned tail and ran for the nearby hills. This still left 4 orcs and their huge leader Brugor to attack our now depleted party of four.

D&D5

Bubbles quickly dispatched one with a herpes arrow to the face. I should explain. Part of Bubbles’ backstory is that they probably/definitely have herpes. At the start of every session, a dice roll is required to see if there is a particularly bad flare-up that day. The dice roll was poor this time, but Bubbles coated an arrow with the herpes to make it… poisonous? More powerful? Disgusting?

Disgusting.

So this poor orc died, from a combination of herpes and an arrow to the face. King Roberto took out another, ramming a javelin up under its chin not unlike what happens to Timothy Dalton in Hot Fuzz, but driving it home through the brainpan instead. The orc leader Brugor was gradually hacked down by the group, leaving two left who immediately surrendered. They were questioned about the location of Cragmoor Castle, but unhappy with the answers from the first now defenceless orc, Roberto slit his throat. The other, very panicked now, gives us gold and a magic coin.

This session, the DM brought in magic items (most of which he bought real-world versions of, from Claire’s Accessories, and which had to be brought along to each session if the holder wanted to use its effects). Lordy yelled ‘MINE!’ straight away, as they did most of the subsequent magic items, which isn’t really how teamwork functions. The orc told us the wizard Cost, the necromancer who sent us to kill all the orcs, was their friend. After letting him go, we set to cutting off all the ears of the dead orcs, and Brugor’s entire head as proof of a job well done. As is tradition, we looted the bodies, where we found a lovely note from one of their kids . Apparently orcs have blue highlighters.

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On way back during the night, Bubbles stole Lordy’s lucky coin. Lots of hassle ensued, and probable meta gaming that probably should have been punished. Back at the Owls Nest, we found Glass-Staff inside the tent talking with Cost, who tried to silently indicate to us to come back later. Bubbles and Glass-Staff recognise each other an have an awkward moment (as Glass-Staff was the one who gave Bubbles herpes) but before any further discussion Lordy attacked for what were very good reasons I’m sure. Cost joined our side in the fight, using a ring to summon a poisonous snake. Trying to take Glass-Staff out non-lethally so we could question him, King Roberto hit him with the bag of ears. Then cut off his right arm. And left leg.

Cost’s snake bit him, the poison from which quickly killed him. Samuel picked up Glass-Staff’s glass staff, and we found a strange bracelet on him, which Lordy took. Cost then attacked us too, after we ask him why he was dealing with our enemy. We defeated his summoned snake, took the snake ring and killed Cost. Then the horde (is eleven a horde?) of zombies attacked through the tent, but it turned out the bracelet could control the zombies. So that’s what we did.

Heading back to Phandolin to rest up, followed by our retinue of zombies, we crossed paths with two Paladins, Goodwin and Tuck, on horseback. Rewarding us for killing both Cost and Glass-Staff, they were however very aggressively opposed to our plan of having our zombie slaves wait outside the peaceful town while we rested at the inn. We agree to give them the bracelet to destroy, which they did, in exchange for some magic shackles and a fucking magic eyepatch, taken from the Pirate King Saltwater Perkins. King Roberto immediately put on the eyepatch, without waiting for the explanation of its powers. The eyepatch bored out his left eye,  but granted him the ability to summon a storm and use lightning powers once a day. Also +1 charisma! So henceforth his new name would be King Roberto the Pirate King.

pirate king

On our way back the sky darkened, and Venomfang circled above us, dropping Tiny’s thieves toolkit and before flying off towards Thundertree laughing. King Roberto the Pirate King started to formulate a plan to liberate (or pillage the already dead bodies of) his companions up at the deserted town, and fight the dragon with his nifty new storm powers.

Near Phandolin, we briefly headed into the woods to slaughter some cultists who had just murdered a group of villagers and were about to sacrifice a boy. Back in town, we turned the boy over to guards. The boy, impressed by King Roberto the Pirate King’s eyepatch, gave him a jar with a tarantula inside for helping him. He was unsure of what to do with it, but as tarantulas are delicious it could prove a useful snack later. For helping with the cultists, the guard set us up with free rooms at the inn. However, as soon as they enter, Elsa the barmaid can’t resist the draw of the eyepatch, wordlessly leading King Roberto the Pirate King off to the best room in the house.

Thus endeth the session. Come back next week for ‘Blackholes and Bear Traps’!

Adam

 

Check out part 6 here!