So Adam and Ian don’t feel like they play enough D&D. To rectify this, they started playing a text-based adventure with a couple of friends, still using the 5th edition framework. We thought it would be fun to clean up the transcripts of this adventure and start publishing it in weekly chapters here on the site. Let us know what you think, and please share around! If you missed Chapter 1, check it out here!
Disclaimer: This is the transcript of a text-based D&D game played over a period of 6 months. Bad language included. Picture based dice rolls/media omitted. Names changed to preserve anonymity. Goblin based violence frequent. You have been warned. If you missed Chapter 37, find it here!
DM: From inside the airship you hear a chorus of howls, and the strange chittering laughter of the gnolls
DM: Bronan, your move. Two singed gnolls by the fire next to faustus, three in front of you and Constance (one of which is badly injured), and three inside up to something
Bronan: Bronan splat nearest gnoll, constance got hit they die then I move forward
Bronan: 15 to hit
DM: That’ll do it. Nearest gnoll is the injured one
DM: What’s the damage
Bronan: A mere 11
DM: The wounded gnoll’s chest is caved in by the hammer
DM: Anything else? If not, Faustus is up
Bronan: Yup that’s me
Faustus: OK faustus closes the distance to the two singed gnolls and strikes at one with his sword
Faustus: Non-natural 20 to hit.
Faustus: 10 slashing damage assuming that hits.
DM: That is enough to slash through one of the singed gnolls thighs , killing it instantly
Faustus: That’ll do me.
DM: The one gnoll next to you throws down its javelin, and tries to rip out your throat with its teeth
DM: 15 to hit
Faustus: Faustus fends him off with his shield.
DM: The two gnolls left by bronan and Constance similarly throw down their weapons and try to bite
DM: 17 Constance, 16 bronan
Constance: 17 hits
Bronan: So does the 16, my abs only give me an ac of 15:(
DM: 6 piercing damage each
Bronan: Okey koaky
Constance: I’m not looking great
Bronan: Mam, I’m on 35 hitpoints and feeling fine, hide behind me
Bronan: I’m not Irish with oedipal issues
DM: Constance, you are up
DM: From inside the ship you hear a sound like rending flesh
Constance: “THAT DOESNT SOUND GOOD!”
Constance: Then I pop open a potion of healing and down it.
Constance: For 8 points of healing
Constance: Then smash the one nearest me in the noodle with my quarter staff
Constance: 22 to hit
DM: That’ll do it
Constance: 7 bludgeoning
DM: You smash into the gnoll breaking a few of his teeth
DM: You done, or any other kung fu/movement?
Constance: nah i can’t cause its my bonus action that lets me kick people to death and i used that to tan health potion
DM: Grand. Bronan?
Bronan: Bronan smash next gnoll in queue, good at serial processinh
Bronan: Balls, I got a 7
Bronan: Too late to say I’m recklessly attacking I guess
Bronan: (sorry constance!)
DM: Eh, you can recklessly attack. You attacking the unwounded gnoll gnashing at you. Or the one Constance is punching teeth out of?
Bronan: I’ll go for the closest to her
Bronan: So the one she is beating
Bronan: Cripes, second was a 14
DM: Woof. Also misses I think. And they have advantage on you next round?
DM: Faustus, your move
Bronan: Yup, they gonna get up on me
Faustus: I pull my sword out of the corpse of the gnoll next to me, and bring it down on the other one.
Faustus: 23 to hit
Faustus: And 11 slashing damage as I bring the sword down from his shoulder to his side
DM: Okay, you get your sword right in there. it only stops when it reaches his spine. he slips off your blade onto the hot sand
Faustus: Looking around, how do the others look like they are getting on?
Constance: (Also how many of these fucks at still standing. Lost track)
DM: Currently two gnolls, one injured by Constance, one uninjured in front of bronan
DM: Two more and a shaman disappeared inside, and you’ve since heard some weird noises from in there
DM: Constance looks pretty bloodied, bronan has taken a few knocks
Faustus: Right… I’m going to run to the entrance and poke my head in to see if I can see what is going on.
DM: Roll for it
Faustus: Oof. 5.
DM: You see what must be the gnolls lair, in amongst broken airship engine parts and shattered crates
DM: One gnoll lies dead, eviscerated, in a circle of runes
DM: Next to it, the gnoll shaman is knelt, its body withered, energy channeling from the rune circle and corpse to the creature next to it. As you stumble into view, you see what was once a gnoll footsoldier. The shaman laughs and collapses, dead or dying
DM: And his creation turns to you
DM: A giant monstrous gnoll
DM: I’ll put it with the gnolls in initiative
Bronan: Errm, is that freaking yeenogoo?(spelling)
DM: (nah not really. A gnoll empowered with a spark of his essence maybe. Didn’t think anyone would recognise that!)
Bronan: (Been reading out of the abyss today in prep for my game)
Constance: (WHAT NOOOOOO!!! Please don’t kill the wiz! I have plans, such beautiful plans!!)
DM: (out of the abyss is soooo lethal)
Constance: (stupid mindflayers)
DM: (our party had a weird TPK so early on its not even funny. we were playing grievous injury rules and grim realism rests. Two martial characters with one leg each, my paladin lost an eye, and our wizard was destroyed by a lava surge)
DM: The gnolls are up!
DM: Constance, your gnoll tries to bite
DM: 17 to hit
DM: 6 damage
DM: Bronan, your gnoll tried to grapple you
DM: Gets a 14 for strength, roll your strength!
Bronan: It’s a 24 with athletics
Bronan: Or 22 with Base strength
DM: Okay you are fine
DM: Faustus, the gnoll Fang of Yeenoghu charges you
DM: It tries twice to rake you with its claws, and once to bite
DM: Presuming the two claws hit you
Faustus: Haha OK the claws do, bite no
DM: That’s 15 slashing damage as his distorted claws tear into you
DM: Constance, you are up. Injured gnoll in front of you, uninjured gnoll by bronan, the sound of rending metal and scuffling at the airship door
Constance: I’m pissed off now.
Constance: So I’m fucking smashing the fuck out of this gnoll with my quarter staff
Constance: 16 to hit
Constance: Boom. Max damage. 12
DM: That gnoll is dead
DM: (Constance am I right in thinking this is the first time you’ve performed the killing blow with your ankh quarterstaff of Ptonos?)
Constance: Woop. Yea.
DM: As the gnoll dies, a gout of black energy surges from its corpse to the staff. a small white rune appears, glowing briefly, on the handle. it appears to be a small skeletal hand
Constance: Ahh! Weird!
Constance: Run over and kick the gnoll currently fighting Bronan in the nuts as a bonus action.
Constance: 22 to hit
Constance: Rolling all the max damage today!
DM: You solidly connect. It whimpers, and seems wounded
DM: one gnoll outside, that Constance just kicked in the nuts, currently trying to rip your throat out. In the airship doorway, a hulking figure is cackling manically and pawing at Faustus
Constance: (how far are we from faustus and the airship?)
DM: 15 ft
Constance: oh shit, didn’t realise it was that close
Constance: in that case can I use my last ki point to kick him in the nuts again?
Constance: 14 to hit
Bronan: It’s OK, Bronan try to smash gnoll in face and then move up to block big gnoll
Bronan: I got a freaking 8, why did I waste a good roll on a strength check!
Bronan: Ah well, I’m gonna push past it anyway and move to the big man
DM: You’ll take an attack of opportunity from the injured gnoll if you do that
Bronan: Yeah it’s cool, I’m raging and my lats will protect me
DM: And it has advantage because you recklessly attacked last round? Or not because this time you didn’t
Bronan: They would’ve done last time but they hit anyway, you could roll twice now to make up in case they get a crit? I attacked normally this round, like an eejit
DM: 21 to hit
DM: 7 slashing damage
Bronan: No worries
Constance: (half for rage no?)
Bronan: (I’ve been halving it. Was it already halved?)
DM: Okay, faustus you are up
Faustus: Right, first I’m going to use vow of enmity as a bonus action. I now have advantage on attacks on him for the next minute
Faustus: I’m then going to slash up at him with my sword (I’m assuming he is taller than me)
Faustus: Either a 16 or a 21 to hit
DM: He is taller than you
DM: The 21 hits
Faustus: Ok, I’m going to make it a divine smite. Is this thing undead or a fiend?
DM: It looks a bit fiendish
Faustus: So I roll I get another d8 on top of the three I’m already rolling…
DM: Shit you are doing a big boy smite
Faustus: Ok 9 slashing, and then real bad rolls on the others for another 9 radiant
DM: Woof. Your sword slashes up, trailing radiance as it slashes into the defied gnoll’s chest
DM: It howls in pain and fixes its eyes on you
DM: Anything else pre gnolls?
Faustus: Don’t think I’ve got anything else to go
DM: Constance, the heavily injured gnoll by you grasps at you and tries to bite your face
DM: 20 to hit
DM: 5 piercing damage
Constance: sheeeiiiit, im pretty fucked up, but still standing
DM: The fang of yeenoghu looms over faustus, screams with rage, and attacks three times. Claw, claw, bite
Come back next Monday for Chapter 39 of The Cursed Tomb!
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