The Cursed Tomb: Chapter 31 – Faustus…Smash

So Adam and Ian don’t feel like they play enough D&D. To rectify this, they started playing a text-based adventure with a couple of friends, still using the 5th edition framework. We thought it would be fun to clean up the transcripts of this adventure and start publishing it in weekly chapters here on the site. Let us know what you think, and please share around! If you missed Chapter 1, check it out here!

Disclaimer: This is the transcript of a text-based D&D game played over a period of 6 months. Bad language included. Picture based dice rolls/media omitted. Names changed to preserve anonymity. Goblin based violence frequent. You have been warned. If you missed Chapter 30, find it here!


DM: The mage looks up at Constance and blast an arrow of bright green acid up at him 17 to hit (10 damage on hit, 5 on save)

DM: The remaining swordsman swings at BRonan ( 15 to hit, 6 slashing if so)

Constance: im down to 14 HP

DM: The three crossbowmen all shoot at Faustus (3, 9, 18 to hit, 6 damage from that high one if it’s enough)

‪Bronan: 15 will hit me

DM: And the mayor shoots his wand at Bronan

‪Bronan: But it’s only 3 cause I’m raging?

Constance: (eh quick question, did the mage get up?)

DM: (no he didn’t)

Constance: (then he has disadvantage on the attack rollllll)

DM: 12 hit?

Faustus: The 18 will hit, rolled a 19 con save so still casting.

Constance: nooope

Constance: (is the 12 the mayor shooting his wand? or you rerolling with disadvantage for the mage?)

DM: Mage

DM: The mayor staggers back from the assaulting barbarian, aims his wand, and shoots it at Faustus

DM: 14 to hit

Faustus: Nope.

DM: Another viscous glob, this one light blue, shoots off past you

DM: Bronan now I believe

Constance: So the 12 from the Mage was a no

DM: Yeah

DM: So only 5 damage constance

Constance: Sweet.

Constance: (Ps what spell was that? Half damage on a miss but attack against AC?)

Constance: (Acid arrow?)

DM: (Acid spear I made up in the pub)

‪Bronan: Bronan smash mayor with the beers

‪Bronan: 14 to hit

DM: He sinuously dodges aside, quickstepping across the blood spattered sand

DM: (What do you want your crossbow guy to do?)

‪Bronan: (take out a crossbow guy if he can)

Faustus: (Mayor still has half speed, has to take damage for it to go)

‪Bronan: Got a 17 natural for the crossbow man’s shot. It’s plus 2 right? So 19 total

DM: Another bolt shoots from the tumbled barn, smashing into the leg one of the crossbowen

DM: Constance, you are up! We still have the mayor, the mage on the ground in front of you, a couple crossbowmen, and a swordsman. Bronan is smashing the mayor, pirates are supporting you from a distance, and Faustus is still chanting…

Constance: ok, im going to bring my staff down on the back of the mages head, then kick him in the face (martial arts lets me use unarmed strike as a bonus without using a ki point), im trying to knock out rather than kill

Constance: nat 1’d the staff but im a lucky halfling

Constance: do i get advantage cause hes prone?

DM: Yup

Constance: ugh, 11 on the staff

Constance: and 14 on the kick

DM: Miss and a miss. He wriggles back in the sand, dodging your staff blow, and as you kick you feel a push of magical energy robbing your blow of its energy

DM: Faustus!

Faustus: I would like my crossbow boy to fire a net at one of the mayor’s crossbow men.

Constance: Balls.

Constance: What about my cleric!?

Faustus: And he misses.

Faustus: And I’m going to try and abjure enemy on the Mayor again, so wisdom save.

DM: Apologies. Constance, what does your cleric do? Mace, sacred flame, or 2x level 1 cure wounds

DM: 18

DM: Save?

Faustus: Yep, so still half speed.

Faustus: Still casting the gem

DM: So a net fires through the night, but the crossbowman isn’t used to the weighting of the mechanism and so he shoots too far left. Faustus raises his holy symbol and casts his glare on the Mayor, but the mayor holds his gaze. Around the spell gem, torrents of arcane energy coil and writhe

DM: Faustus, make an arcana check for me?

Faustus: Nat 20

DM: This thing is pretty much ready to burst. You think you’ll be able to use it on your next turn

Faustus: Can I as a last part of my turn duck down more so I have more cover?

Constance: Sacred flame the swordsman

Faustus: Because presumably no one else knows this.

DM: Yes

DM: Swordsman failed, what’s the damage?

Constance: 1d8 so 6

DM: The swordsman wails as a holy fire descends onto him, and he collapses to the ground, twitching

Constance: (can we have a run down of the scene? like who is still standing?)

DM: Sure thing

DM: Varratim swings his sabre and kills a crossbowman with a single stroke, burying the steel of his sword deep into his enemies chest

DM: And now it’s the bad guys

DM: Three crossbowmen all try and shoot at Varratim, two of them successfully, and he collapses to the ground with two bolts stuck in him

DM: Swordsman tries to grapple bronan (18 strength check, contest that please Bronan!)

Faustus: Hold on, there were 3 and you said he just killed one?

DM: Oops, apologies. Well. It was the one by him who missed due to disadvantage on ranged attack from close quarters. So he still goes down

Constance: (goes down as in dead? making death saves?)

DM: (yup)

‪Bronan: Is it a strength save?

DM: Yes

‪Bronan: Cool, I’m a barbie so advantage on that in my rage

‪Bronan: Ballsacks, it was a 10 and a 12, so 12, gods damn you wizards dice roller

DM: The swordsman manages to get a hold of you

DM: And as he does, three darts of magical light burst from the mages staff, hitting each of you for 3 damage (constitution save please faustus)

Constance: is he up yet? or still prone?

‪Bronan: I’m bear totem, so 1 for bronan

Constance: (whats that?!)

‪Bronan: (means you are resistant to every damage apart from psychic when raging)

Constance: (shit the bed thats tops)

‪Bronan: (hence the bear killing story and loincloth)

Faustus: 18

DM: He stood up

Constance: (that cunt)

DM: And faustus, you are still holding the gem, and it still seems focused

DM: The mayor puts away his wand and draws his rapier, which crackles with electricity. He tries to skewer Bronan! (advantage as you are grappled) 5 or 17 to hit

‪Bronan: The 17 will hit!

DM: 6 piercing + 12 electricity (it’s a magic weapon so I don’t think you get resistance)

DM: And he whispers to you as he draws close

Constance: jesus!

Faustus: The bear thing does give some elemental resistance I think though

DM: “I will have my power”

Constance: “Bear. While raging, you have resistance to all damage

DM: Oh cool

DM: So 9

‪Bronan: Bronan  shouts “no wash hand before gem, wash hands!!”

Faustus: (If it’s our turn now I’m gonna yell something before everyone goes)

DM: It’s bronan now

Faustus: Bronan, Constance, grab Varratim and get clear!

‪Bronan: I try to barbarian jujitsu out of the grapple

‪Bronan: Which is basically just ripping his hands off me

‪Bronan: Guessing a strength/athletics check?

‪Bronan: Thats a 24 and a 6, so 24

DM: Wow. Yeah you rip him off you and throw him to the ground

DM: Do you do anything else?

DM: And what about your crossbow pirate?

‪Bronan: I’m gonna run and grab varratim and run off to the side essentially trying to get him to the cleric, my ac is 14, let the opportunity attacks rain down!

‪Bronan: Crossbow dude is gonna try to pop another shot at the crossbow guy he hit last time

‪Bronan: And again, gets a 19 total

DM: Crossbow dude manages to pop a shot off and shoot down one of the remaining mayor’s henchmen, who falls dead to the sand

DM: You can only make it half your speed if you are grabbing Varratim

DM: And you will take…a few opportunity attacks!

DM: One from the swordsman (15 to hit, 6 slashing if so) one from the mayor (22 to hit, 7 slashing + 12 electric), and the final crossbowman (16 to hit, 5 piercing)

Faustus: Oh fuck

DM: So yeah not sure how much of that hits you

‪Bronan: I’m down, minus 1 hp

Constance: 15 damage total by the looks of things!

‪Bronan: So death save, that’s a con save? Or pure roll?

DM: Pure roll, but not until your next turn

Constance: (yeah we do that a bit differently Bronan)

Constance: (im pretty sure we do it “wrong” but its harsher and i like it)

‪Bronan: (ok no worries:))

Faustus: (Ah fucks. This has all gone badly.)

DM: Constance you’re up

‪Bronan: (it’s cool man, Melbos just has to die now)

Constance: Fuck.

Constance: Ok.

Constance: How far am i from Bronan and where is Bronan in relation to hear Fucks

DM: Bronan is now where varratim is on the map

Faustus: (Procedural question – am I getting as much control over the dimensions of this spell as I would if I would cast it as a high level mage?)

DM: (Yup!)

Constance: So I’m thinking that first I command the priest to heal Bronan.

Constance: Which is 1d8 healing plus spell casting mod

Constance: Then I’m assuming that o have enough movement to run to varratim

DM: You have just enough yeah

DM: Bronan, you are at +8 health!

‪Bronan: (whoop whoop!)

Constance: (did you roll that d8 then?)

DM: (yup,7+1)

Constance: ok so my assumption is of the three things i want to do that I can only do 2. I want to take the disengage action (which i can do either as a bonus cause im a monk, or a full action) feed varratim the potion of healing i have, and throw a smoke bomb as i run past the mayor

DM: You are correct. Pick two!

Constance: ill disengage as a full, pelt it over to varratim and bronan, and potion to varratim as a bonus

Constance: 2d4 + 2 healing right?

DM: Yeah

Constance: 7 total

DM: Varratim gorggily awakes

DM: It’s your turn Faustus

Faustus: OK so Faustus raises up from behind the cart, pointing the gem now at the Mayor and says “Calm down friend, here’s your gem right here” and then casts the spell. I’d like it to be contained directly on all the enemies, which I think is doable, and for it to be 100ft high and 50ft thick with that going on top of them. Probably needs to be about 60ft wide from the diagram to cover them all? All aimed so it doesn’t hit Bronan, Constance or Varratim.

Faustus: So if I’m reading this right, that happens and all those guys have to make strength saves? 6d10 on a fail, half damage on a success? Is that going to be against my spell DC or something else from the gem?

DM: It’s something else for the gem

DM: DC 18

Faustus: Oh dip.

DM: The two crossbowmen fail. The swordsman fails. The mage fails. The mayor fails

DM: Roll your damage

Constance: SHEEEIIIT

Faustus: Ah man not great rolls. 25 damage.

Faustus: And they are all trapped in a wall of water I believe.

DM: A vicious tsunamai materialises in front of Faustus, just past varratim, Constance, and Bronan, who lean back from the tumult of water

DM: It picks up the crossbowmen and the swordsman and the mayor and slams them into the ground over and over, twisting around and over again and again

DM: The mage tries to misty step out, but it doesn’t work, as the water grabs him and coils him and slams him against the sand and rocks

DM: You can see instantly the crossbowmen are dead, broken. The swordsmans spine twists and cracks as the wave pounds him into the dust. After a few moments of struggling the mage grows still

DM: The mayor is still struggling, and still alive

‪Bronan: Bronan mutters in awe “Faustus….smash…”

DM: The cart that the mayor’s men arrived in, and the camel pulling it, are also pulled up into the maelstrom of sand and rocks and churning water

Faustus: Oh no! Poor camel.

DM: Varratim stares in awe

DM: Bronan it’s your turn

Faustus: So I think each turn (though we are out of combat) the Mayor needs to make a strength save to leave it. If he fails he takes damage again. Which as I said it was 100ft tall, the height would go down to 50ft and he’d take 5d10 this time.

DM: And it moves 50ft away from you

Faustus: Yes. With him still in it if he can’t escape.

DM: So up to you guys, can do this turn by turn, but if not then I think it will move a few hundred feet and he will take a few dozen d10 damage…

Faustus: Well it’ll be gone by the time it move 100ft I think.

Faustus: (So guys are we still capturing him or killing him?)

‪Bronan: Guess I trot after with the manacles?

DM: (yeah you can choose to stop concentrating if you want)

Constance: I mean Constance would have heavily made the point that we should capture not kill where possible before his

Constance: As that’s my whole deal

‪Bronan: (nothing quite like a pug themed torture scene)

Faustus: (Well we didn’t damage him at all before. So he can stand to take another 5d10 I think…)

‪Bronan: (I think he had one beer from the beers)

‪Bronan: (up to you though man, to wash or not to wash)

Faustus: OK Faustus let’s him take another batch of damage before releasing. So I guess strength save? Would you still take half on a success?

DM: Doesn’t say so in the spell description

Faustus: OK strength save to escape then!

Faustus: I guess we all get ready too in case he breaks out.

DM: He fails the strength save as the wave moves 50ft away from you

DM: How much damage?

Faustus: 22 damage. And should we all follow?

‪Bronan: I’m trotting after

Constance: I’m also chasing as I think I have the manacles

Faustus: Cool. Also chasing. “Varratim we need to get ready to leave!”

DM: Are you maintaining it or letting it fall

Faustus: Can I see what the Mayor looks like right now from where I am? I guess about 20ft from him. Conscious?

DM: It’s almost dark now

Constance: as we run I’m going to shout, “EVERYONE TO THE FARMHOUSE”

DM: When you run up you can make a perception check for me

DM: But it’s a pounding mass of water and dirt and corpses and stones

Faustus: 17

DM: You can see the mayor’s limp body

Faustus: Alright I’ll let it fall.

DM: The water disappears in an instant

Faustus: Just in case he is faking I think someone else should run up and kick/take away his wand and chain him up before reviving.

Constance: yeah i can fucking pelt up

Faustus: (I say that so he doesn’t nab the gem, not because I’m a coward!)

Faustus: Also what is the gem doing now?

DM: As the water dissapears the corpses of the mayor’s henchman fall to the ground, as does the cart and camel

DM: And the mayor lies face down

Constance: im going to run up and disarm him before putting the manacles on

DM: You can easily do that

DM: He doesn’t appear to be breathing


Come back next Monday for Chapter 32 of The Cursed Tomb!


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