So Adam and Ian don’t feel like they play enough D&D. To rectify this, they started playing a text-based adventure with a couple of friends, still using the 5th edition framework. We thought it would be fun to clean up the transcripts of this adventure and start publishing it in weekly chapters here on the site. Let us know what you think, and please share around! If you missed Chapter 1, check it out here!
Disclaimer: This is the transcript of a text-based D&D game played over a period of 6 months. Bad language included. Picture based dice rolls/media omitted. Names changed to preserve anonymity. Goblin based violence frequent. You have been warned.
Bronan: Bronan yawns, puts his loincloth on. Searches for Sir dribbles, who is cooking a leg on the gnoll
Faustus: Wait, isn’t sir dribbles the pug? He can cook?
DM: Cocking a leg? Hahaha
Bronan: Sorry, cocking
DM: Ha
Bronan: Though he does have a chef hat that he wears when it’s chow time
DM: It doesn’t take you long to break your fast and strike camp. It’s clear that Jamsi can’t walk far, if at all
Constance: Can we construct a rudimentary sledge or something? Take him with us. He could be a useful guide / bait
Bronan: I can drag?
DM: You have rope, and can easily make a stretcher like structure to be dragged. Where do you go? Constance, you have the amulet?
Constance: I do. In my pouch.
DM: Okay, let me know where you guys are headed/what’s up
Faustus: Up the dune for a better look around?
DM: Perception please
Faustus: 14
DM: The sand appears clear, it’s about 300ft until the shadowy entry to the gulch, which looks to be 10ft wide
DM: Jamsi is muttering in gnoll trying to hide his face from the sun as he is dragged along
Bronan: As we’re going I offer Constance and Faustus my spare loincloth as a sun hat “come on bros, sunstroke isn’t a laughing matter”
Faustus: My lizard skin is unaffected by the sun and I’m assuming my resistance to fire can extend to general heat?
Faustus: I can’t remember if I said. I’m a red dragonborn.
Constance: I pull the hood of my robes up to protect me from the harsh rays of the sun and take a swig from my water skin. Before we head on, I pull out the amulet and inspect it further
DM: Faustus, yes.
DM: Constance, roll investigation or religion or arcana, depending on what you are trying to discern. If General, investigation
Bronan: Ok bros, stay hydrated 🙂 I feed sir dribbles some water, it goes everywhere
Constance: (Investigation is int right?)
Constance: If so 13.
DM: It is some sort of talisman, you think symbolizing life. Not normally associated with gnolls
DM: What are you guys doing
Faustus: Light a torch at the entrance
DM: You can see about 30ft down. It is dimly lit by refracted sunlight
DM: And your torch
DM: The ground is rockier here, and a few tiny plants creep from the rock walls
DM: Ahead the pass curves left
Faustus: Do I recognise any of the plants?
Constance: I’m very tempted to put the talisman on. But think better of it and stick it in my pocket
DM: Faustus, nature check
Faustus: 18
Bronan: Can I survival roll to see if I recognise the plants?
Bronan: I got a 15
DM: You both recognise this as stripweed, a resilient plant that is a good source of water. There aren’t too many of them around in this canyon
DM: But a few
DM: Are you moving forward?
Faustus: I think so? I can take point if we are in agreement?
Constance: Onward!
Faustus: Ok I move cautiously forward. Torch in front in my left, sword drawn in right.
Constance: I follow behind with weapon sheathed but ready to spring into action.
Bronan: Bronan draws his axe
DM: As you proceed, the gulch narrows and widens and twists and turns.It is never constant for long, but is blessedly cool compared to the scorching dune. Jamsi murmurs and mutters. After several hours, the rock plinths and walls surrounding you start to grow smaller until you are facing a vast plain of dark red grass and undulating hills. It feels cooler here, and a breeze blows across your faces from the west
Constance: I gesture across the plain and look at Jamsi
DM: He is feverish and uncooperative
DM: He keeps muttering “Ptonos”
Constance: Can I do a medicine check to see if his wounds are infected?
DM: Sure
Constance: 3 + 4. 7.
DM: He has lost a lot of blood
DM: Not looking good
Constance: Well shit. I have a herbalism kit and a healers kit. Anything I can do with those?
DM: Yup medicine check to see how it goes
Constance: Ok. So my medicine kit has bandages salves and splints. I’m going to change his bandages on his leg and put some “ye olde Sudocreme” on his wound. 9 + 4 = 13
DM: Okay his leg wounds are firmly clean and bound now. He indicates he would rather walk than be dragged
DM: Aside from the red grass, nothing seems alive this side of the obsidian shards. If you head directly west, you should arrive near the temple around nightfall. What do you do? (if heading west, someone roll a d6)
DM: And if anyone wants to make a history, nature, or general perception check feel free
DM: “Ptolnos pelastaa minut” says Jamsi. He keeps staring at Sir Dribbles and licking his lips
Faustus: I give him another lunchable, look at Sir Dribbles then back at him and shake my head. I tap my sword so he gets the idea.
Faustus: Also yeah we head West?
DM: Cool, roll a d6
Faustus: 3
DM: As the day passes, almost at the limit of your vision two birds circle high above you. After a few hours they fly away north
DM: As night falls you see a structure rise ahead of you
Constance: I point at the structure and turn to Jamsi and say “Ptolnus?”
DM: Jamsi smiles a toothy smile
Constance: Does Jamsi seem to be starting to warm to us? Or does he seem biding his time till he can murder is in our sleep?
DM: Perception roll please
Constance: Not insight?
DM: Sure, insight
DM: The red tiered temple rises from the dust- no grass seems to grow here. Above the entrance, an ankh like the one on the gnoll locket
Constance: 17 + 4 = 21
DM: He looks like he is about to make a run for it
Bronan: Shit, missed a lot, can I roll perception? Seems weird as shit there is grass here, I want to take a closer look
Bronan: Got a 16 total
Bronan: I turn to Jamsi and say “come with me if you want to live”
DM: Bronan, the grass is very strange and brittle. It seems very dry
DM: But not even the strange red desert grass grows around this structure. If your bearings were right, this should be the tomb of Ptonos
Bronan: “be careful with the torch boys, one wrong move and we could go up in flahmes!”
DM: Jamsi looks confused and impatient and starts gesturing to the temple
Bronan: Would I know if gnolls are normally evil, peaceful or whatever?
DM: History check please
Bronan: Awww shit, ok
Constance: I pull out the amulet (out of reach of Jamsi) to see if being near where it came from has any effect.
Bronan: 17-1, 16
DM: Gnolls are desert scavengers
DM: Prone to violence, but normally cowards really
DM: The amulet Ankh is identical in shape to the Ankh above the tomb entrance
Constance: “Well boys, let’s skirt around, chef for surprised eh?”
Bronan: “Bronan does not fully trust dogman, Bronan say we make him go first, none of Bronans friends will get hurt because of sneaky dogman”
Constance: He’s wounded and restrained. What could he possibly do?
Bronan: Don’t know, that’s why dogmen are sneaky! But ok, I’ll get ready to give him some beer if he tries anything
DM: So you are circling the tomb entrance looking for…traps etc? Gnolls? Roll investigation or perception depending that you want to look at
Bronan: Bronan is looking for gnoll or gnoll traps, perception?
DM: Sure
Faustus: I’m going to look out for tracks.
Bronan: 11+3, 14
Faustus: 19
DM: Bronan, you can’t see any gnolls or gnoll traps, but you do spot some rising smoke (a gnoll fire?!) A few miles away to the north
DM: Faustus, you can see tracks going into the tomb entrance. Gnolls. At least 3, maybe 5? The tracks leave the tomb, straight across the empty ground to the grass, then circle north.
DM: Looks like they were moving quickly on that non-grass area
Bronan: I point it out to Constance and Faustus, “it’s either a gnoll fire or someone is having a hell of a smoking party”
Constance: I turn to Jamsi and in a very mumsy voice say his name. Pointing around at the things what we done just noticed.
DM: Jamai shrugs
DM: Then spits at your feet
DM: “Ptonos ja veljeni syö sydämesi , pakana”
Bronan: Do you think he is asking for some beer?
Faustus: I spit at his feet too
Bronan: *brandishes axe*
Bronan: I pick him up by the throat with one hand (or try to)
DM: He is scrawny and malnourished, you can easily lift him.
Constance: Calm down Bronan! He’s rude but no threat to us.
DM: As you speak he goes into a frenzy, snapping his jaws at bronan and kicking his feet!
Constance: You’re scaring him my dude!
Bronan: I bring him in close “listen dogman, you will show my friends respect, or I’ll make you half a dogman” push him at arm’s length and say “Constance, it’s OK, this is how I trained sir dribbles, now he only nibbles my leg when he needs to do his business”
DM: his attack is unsuccessful
Bronan: We need to find his business and rub his nose in it, that’ll make him learn
DM: He starts to laugh in a manic way, very very loud
Bronan: Still holding him, I turn to Constance, “my Bro, you want me to put him down?”
DM: “Vejet , Ptonos, pelasta minut ! Murskaa nämä kirottu vaaleanpunainen nahat!”
Constance: Well he’s getting out of hand now. Let’s tie him to a nearby tree or something
DM: No trees
DM: Red grass, dust, tomb
Bronan: I gesture around the place, dogman still in hand, which trees?
DM: He attacks you again
Bronan: I can try to stop him Barking if it’s annoying you guys?
Bronan: Ok cool, my ac is 14
DM: But shackled as he is and wounded as he is and being held by his throat, all he can do is kick ineffectualt
DM: “Veljet, Ptonos! VELJET!”
Faustus: If i walk towards the tomb does he do anything?
Constance: Damnit Jamsi I’m trying to help you!
DM: Nah he keeps thashimg and yelling
Constance: Can we hogtie him on the floor Bronan?
Bronan: Put my greataxe in its backsheath, pull Jamsi closer and wag a finger in his face “no, bad dogman, keep Barking and I’ll swop your nose”
Bronan: Swot*
Bronan: We could, but that is cruelty to animals
Bronan: Sir dribbles pikes his head from my loincloth and snot/barks in agreement
Bronan: Pokes* goddamn autocorrect
DM: He bites your face
DM: 2 damage
DM: And then laughs manically again and yelling Ptonos. He is frothing at the mouth now
Constance: Damnit Jamsi! Don’t make me do this!
DM: He continues, the only sound in this arid wasteland is him thrashing and biting his jaws and yelling and laughing
DM: Bronan, you are still holding him? Presumably at arm’s length now. He tries to escape your grapple, make a strength check for me please
Faustus: I walk up and pierce his side with my sword
Faustus: 19 to hit
DM: Faustus’s blade slips up into the gnoll’s hide, and in moments he is still, dangling from the arm of Bronan
DM: The land falls still, silent as bone
Bronan: Ok, shit missed all the action again!
Bronan: Damn laundry
Bronan: “don’t worry my bros, I didn’t get my blood on your clothes did I? If so, give to Bronan, he will clean”
Bronan: I drop the dead dogman
Bronan: Well, he was a bad dog, do we explore temple now? Bad dogman can’t hurt you guys now
Constance: Nooooooooooooooooooo
Constance: I weep silently.
Bronan: Oh constance, buddy, what’s wrong, did you get dirt in your eye? Let me get that for you, I pull the spare loincloth and start dabbing away his tears
Constance: I bat his hand away.
Constance: He didn’t have to die, JAMSI YOU FOOL
Constance: WHAT MADNESS DROVE YOU TO THIS
Bronan: It’s OK Constance he is chasing rabbits in doggyman heaven now, no more hunger there, no leg wounds from javelins
Bronan: Snuggle with Sir dribbles, he is a good listener #snortbark#
Faustus: I clean my blade and say “there Constance. Now you didn’t have to do something you didn’t want to do”
DM: The sun is almost fully set, the tomb outlined in the last vestiges of Amber light
Bronan: Hey, maybe we make camp, hey? Or go inside? Constance having something to do helps a Bro grieve
Faustus: Well we’ve been travelling all day. Equally, if no one is tired, it’s unlikely to be awash with sunlight in there during the day anyway.
Bronan: I’m pretty ok, I mean the dogman scratches me, but it’s cool *uncorked, swig, recork the axe ale* sir dribbles did me worse when I tried to make him wear his chef hat the first time, now he loves it!
Bronan: Shall we go in?
Faustus: Sure. Though, the amulet. It’s definitely linked to the tomb in some way. Is it protective? Do we need 3?
Bronan: We get some more necklaces from the dogmen?
Faustus: That’s what I was thinking.
Bronan: Ok with me, pappa always told me hair of the dog cures all wounds
Faustus: Exactly
Bronan: Constance, you OK Bro? We need to get necklaces, we go get some?
DM: Can roll arcana to see if you think the necklace is magical?
Bronan: Me?
DM: Faustus was the one positing some protective role for it
Faustus: I got a 14
DM: Right
DM: It is magical, but very very weakly
Bronan: Ah ok
Bronan: I got an 8 anyway
DM: Some sort of evocation magic
Constance: I yell JAMSI!!!!!! And throwing the amulet on I charge toward the entrance.
Come back next Monday for Chapter 3 of The Cursed Tomb!
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